Very early in my teaching career I took over a class of 40 students. It was late in the evening and class was about to end and as I tried to help each 14 year old with a project given to them, I heard a fight break out between two students. 

![students fighting.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmWcu6XtyNJVymmKWnwsvjMyT3pumKTkrxNudtxz7mrYA5/students%20fighting.jpg)

Going into full teacher mode, I was going to bring the wrath of God, the swift hammer of justice, the punishment they deserve on them. But something stopped me, I proceeded to ask what was wrong and the student replied in the 'nicest' way possible that I should 'shove it up my a$$'. 


![shocked face.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmRF9MzqQoLxcirgYkdAcAE54dm5o5UeBpvPSuNZ8tqJif/shocked%20face.jpg)

There was total silence in the class as the every student waited for my reaction. I paused and said, see me after class.

After class, the student walked defiantly into the room, crossed his arms and sat down. So I asked if he was  alright and if the family was doing fine. The student replied with the common teenage answer of 'fine' and 'good'. But not long after started to break down in tears, claiming that the parents were in the midst of a divorce. Going home was no fun where all he could hear was loud fighting and arguing. 

![parents arguing.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmfS3PXJKLiupasHt6B7prsdy5o5fXpSBqvVMW9fHSGhYw/parents%20arguing.jpg)



I just sat there and listened. At the end offered to be there if he needs advice or just someone to talk to. The next day, the student was back to normal and fast forward 7 years later, he is in University and we are still in contact. 

This incident has helped me learnt a few things in managing my students, be it teens, children or even people:

**1) They have their problems too**
Some students are disruptive for a reason, they may be facing problems at home or at school. It may be very difficult to listen or ask them what's wrong **at first**, but once I take the time to know them, their stories, their struggles, it helps me empathize with them. 

After a while, that anger, that annoyed feeling just goes away and it becomes easy to help and guide them through a rough time. 


**2) Just listen** 
It just takes a few moments to hear them out which is often times much more powerful than helping them solve their problems. I've learnt that at times all a student or a grieving friend wants is someone to listen to. 


**3) Helping one person at a time**
I know it sounds very idealistic but let me explain. A mentor once asked me, how would you make an impact in your career? The answer given was to change one life at a time and slowly you end up helping and impacting more people than you can imagine. 


One of the few reasons that I still stay a teacher is that nothing beats when a student steps up and say thank you for changing their lives. 

This is my second post thus far on steemit, I hope you've enjoyed it. Do let me know what you think about it in comments below!