This morning, I was the first one up, so while I was in the kitchen making the coffee, I also listened to messages on the answering machine.

Since Mrs. Denmarkguy has counseling clients all over the globe, calls also come in at all hours because of time zones and such.


![0369-BlueMoonflower.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/denmarkguy/23x14iJ459z9WcmmX2w5DRdr7tbJcavrDuJnQ8tnyKw3EPPGEUBiSVLzVnrn2brYjPRBE.jpg)


One of the messages was a protracted diatribe from a long-time client who seems to *always* be complaining that she is having  *"a major problem"* with one thing or another in her life.

Now, it's not for me to divulge the nature of anything said *(for obvious confidentiality reasons)* but the message *did* get me to thinking about the fairly substantial number of people in the world who come across as almost *addicted* to *"having a problem."*

I remember one of my old neighbors at my apartment where I lived in my mid-30's. Her life was just one long stream of end-to-end crises. And on the rare occasion when there was actually a moment of peace, it was almost as if she *went in search of a problem.*

I think, perhaps, what confused me the *most* about her situation was that she would always insist that this interminable series of problems was just *a temporary setback.* 


![0447-Yellow.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/denmarkguy/23z7L8kG2KWZJY1yPg3sKutqhFZXeDUPhtTvTbPy5CgwzYTPRcrREVT4jF6G6CZmE2pHo.jpg)


## *I'd Call That a LIFESTYLE!*

When *everything* is a problem, every day, all the time... are they really *"problems,"* or are you simply choosing a lifestyle that allows you to complain all the time, and to constantly need the help of others to keep your world from caving in? 

I don't claim to be an *expert* on any of this, but my former neighbor and Mrs. Denmarkguy's client don't strike me as *"rare isolated cases,"* but instead as something fairly common.

And it is not that these people seem to *enjoy* complaining *(perhaps to "provoke a reaction?")*, but complaining can be a very effective way of putting distance between you and other people. I have noticed that chronic complainers often have difficulty being in close relationships and can almost always find reasons why *others* are wrong and thus not to be trusted... thereby creating *"separation."*


![0371-Heather.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/denmarkguy/Eopuki6CKsDAXYb3a5HGZavnv8QHNTiNhNhG85EXqCMfEhkHMdvUw1RRxG7WxH93XPa.jpg)


Aforesaid neighbor was always lamenting her *"bad luck"* with men while also implying that she *really wanted* a relationship. But even though she seemed to have a quite active dating life, I never saw her with a man (at least that I got to meet) that was even *remotely* capable of being in any semblance of a stable relationship.

Toxic as it might sound... it felt very much like she was *actually* choosing her partners based on a need to *"prove"* that she would never have a relationship.

The human psyche is a *fascinating* — and yet often incomprehensible — thing.

Thanks for reading, and have a great rest of your day!

***How about YOU? Know any chronic complainers and chaos mongerers? Have you perhaps been one? What do you think the underlying motivation is? Do some people actually get addicted to emotional pain? Comments, feedback and other interaction is invited and welcomed! Because — after all — SOCIAL content is about interacting, right? Leave a comment — share your experiences — be part of the conversation!***

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