## Fear
... is crippling. The uncertainty that fear brings can either make or break chances and moments for one person. Personally, I am scared of way too many things. I have an irrational fear of crossing highways, and I balk at the mere mention of open wounds. I don't like speaking in front of an audience (but I do, sometimes). 

And that's today's prompt. 

<center>https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/erangvee/VExzt6Ou-1595144427964-01.jpeg</center>

## Drawing *Fear*
Today's portrait is based off [Abel-Insane](https://www.abelinsane.com/about)'s portrait photography with [Mary Navarro](https://www.emgmodels.com/new-york/women/ny-w-main/mary-navarro/portfolio/ny-w-main) ([see here](https://pin.it/5voSUXH)). I don't think the original idea was to portray fear, but that's what I interpreted anyway.

You know how people say that eyes don't lie? Eyes don't lie because they are the windows to a person's soul. I liked her eyes in the original photograph, which ultimately urged me to draw her.

<center>https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/erangvee/pN5cJkN7-eyes.jpg</center>

This digital painting is, yet again, drawn with MediBang Paint for Android on my Note 10+. I'd been meaning to shift to another app, but I guess you can say I have grown accustomed to MediBang's environment.

After all, I had a formula already set ⁠— pencil for the initial sketch, watercolor and pen for the base color, watercolor and blur for the rest. Because of this so-called "formula", I'm finding it hard to try other drawing apps.

Below is a quick GIF of how the drawing process went. I think I will have to experiment one of these days and try things outside my accidental formula.

<center>https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/erangvee/B1FbGRno-progshots.gif</center>


### Details
* *Device:* Samsung Galaxy Note 10+
* *Apps:* 
   * [MediBang Paint](https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.medibang.android.paint.tablet) for Android
   * [Snapseed](https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.niksoftware.snapseed&hl=en)
* *Brushes:* watercolor (at varying opacity settings); pencil (100% opacity); airbrush; blur

## Notes
I also fear losing people. It doesn't matter if I know them personally or not, as long as they've placed a mark in my life, then I fear losing them. Yesterday, [Haruma Miura](https://g.co/kgs/JUwc7C), one of my favorite actors, passed away. He was 30.

How sad is it that in my three years in the blockchain, he is the third person I am writing a blog about... who took his own life. I used to call him *Mr. Bright Smile* because he had a really pretty smile!

<center>https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/erangvee/hB5Ueew0-image.png<br><sub>I call Haruma Miura *Mr. Bright Smile* because of his happy, albeit cheeky, smile. <a href="https://ticket-news.pia.jp/pia/news_image.do?newsCd=201208310005&imageCd=3">Source</a></sub></center>

When he was 20, [he wrote to his 30-year-old self](https://twitter.com/Rizcha0822/status/1284413752482254849?s=20) asking if he's been spending his days happily. And here we are now. 

Shine bright, Haruma Miura. 

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