The Comedy of Errors - Act 1, Scene 2 - William Shakespeare

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The Comedy of Errors - Act 1, Scene 2 - William Shakespeare
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<h3>SCENE II. The Mart.</h3>
<blockquote><em>Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse, DROMIO of Syracuse, and First Merchant</em></blockquote>
<p><strong>First Merchant</strong></p>
<blockquote>Therefore give out you are of Epidamnum,<br>
Lest that your goods too soon be confiscate.<br>
This very day a Syracusian merchant<br>
Is apprehended for arrival here;<br>
And not being able to buy out his life<br>
According to the statute of the town,<br>
Dies ere the weary sun set in the west.<br>
There is your money that I had to keep.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>Go bear it to the Centaur, where we host,<br>
And stay there, Dromio, till I come to thee.<br>
Within this hour it will be dinner-time:<br>
Till that, I'll view the manners of the town,<br>
Peruse the traders, gaze upon the buildings,<br>
And then return and sleep within mine inn,<br>
For with long travel I am stiff and weary.<br>
Get thee away.<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>Many a man would take you at your word,<br>
And go indeed, having so good a mean.<br>
<em>Exit</em>ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>A trusty villain, sir, that very oft,<br>
When I am dull with care and melancholy,<br>
Lightens my humour with his merry jests.<br>
What, will you walk with me about the town,<br>
And then go to my inn and dine with me?<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>First Merchant</strong></p>
<blockquote>I am invited, sir, to certain merchants,<br>
Of whom I hope to make much benefit;<br>
I crave your pardon. Soon at five o'clock,<br>
Please you, I'll meet with you upon the mart<br>
And afterward consort you till bed-time:<br>
My present business calls me from you now.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>Farewell till then: I will go lose myself<br>
And wander up and down to view the city.<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>First Merchant</strong></p>
<blockquote>Sir, I commend you to your own content.<br>
<em>Exit</em>ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>He that commends me to mine own content<br>
Commends me to the thing I cannot get.<br>
I to the world am like a drop of water<br>
That in the ocean seeks another drop,<br>
Who, falling there to find his fellow forth,<br>
Unseen, inquisitive, confounds himself:<br>
So I, to find a mother and a brother,<br>
In quest of them, unhappy, lose myself.<br>
<em>Enter DROMIO of Ephesus</em>Here comes the almanac of my true date.<br>
What now? how chance thou art return'd so soon?<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF EPHESUS</strong></p>
<blockquote>Return'd so soon! rather approach'd too late:<br>
The capon burns, the pig falls from the spit,<br>
The clock hath strucken twelve upon the bell;<br>
My mistress made it one upon my cheek:<br>
She is so hot because the meat is cold;<br>
The meat is cold because you come not home;<br>
You come not home because you have no stomach;<br>
You have no stomach having broke your fast;<br>
But we that know what 'tis to fast and pray<br>
Are penitent for your default to-day.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>Stop in your wind, sir: tell me this, I pray:<br>
Where have you left the money that I gave you?<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF EPHESUS</strong></p>
<blockquote>O,--sixpence, that I had o' Wednesday last<br>
To pay the saddler for my mistress' crupper?<br>
The saddler had it, sir; I kept it not.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>I am not in a sportive humour now:<br>
Tell me, and dally not, where is the money?<br>
We being strangers here, how darest thou trust<br>
So great a charge from thine own custody?<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF EPHESUS</strong></p>
<blockquote>I pray you, air, as you sit at dinner:<br>
I from my mistress come to you in post;<br>
If I return, I shall be post indeed,<br>
For she will score your fault upon my pate.<br>
Methinks your maw, like mine, should be your clock,<br>
And strike you home without a messenger.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>Come, Dromio, come, these jests are out of season;<br>
Reserve them till a merrier hour than this.<br>
Where is the gold I gave in charge to thee?<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF EPHESUS</strong></p>
<blockquote>To me, sir? why, you gave no gold to me.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>Come on, sir knave, have done your foolishness,<br>
And tell me how thou hast disposed thy charge.<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF EPHESUS</strong></p>
<blockquote>My charge was but to fetch you from the mart<br>
Home to your house, the Phoenix, sir, to dinner:<br>
My mistress and her sister stays for you.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>In what safe place you have bestow'd my money,<br>
Or I shall break that merry sconce of yours<br>
That stands on tricks when I am undisposed:<br>
Where is the thousand marks thou hadst of me?<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF EPHESUS</strong></p>
<blockquote>I have some marks of yours upon my pate,<br>
Some of my mistress' marks upon my shoulders,<br>
But not a thousand marks between you both.<br>
If I should pay your worship those again,<br>
Perchance you will not bear them patiently.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>Thy mistress' marks? what mistress, slave, hast thou?<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF EPHESUS</strong></p>
<blockquote>Your worship's wife, my mistress at the Phoenix;<br>
She that doth fast till you come home to dinner,<br>
And prays that you will hie you home to dinner.<br>
ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>What, wilt thou flout me thus unto my face,<br>
Being forbid? There, take you that, sir knave.<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>DROMIO OF EPHESUS</strong></p>
<blockquote>What mean you, sir? for God's sake, hold your hands!<br>
Nay, and you will not, sir, I'll take my heels.<br>
<em>Exit</em>ANTIPHOLUS<br>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>OF SYRACUSE</strong></p>
<blockquote>Upon my life, by some device or other<br>
The villain is o'er-raught of all my money.<br>
They say this town is full of cozenage,<br>
As, nimble jugglers that deceive the eye,<br>
Dark-working sorcerers that change the mind,<br>
Soul-killing witches that deform the body,<br>
Disguised cheaters, prating mountebanks,<br>
And many such-like liberties of sin:<br>
If it prove so, I will be gone the sooner.<br>
I'll to the Centaur, to go seek this slave:<br>
I greatly fear my money is not safe.<br>
</blockquote>
<p>Exit</p>
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