Below is a post I drafted to put on FB. I became the bigger person and never posted it on FB. But I had to share it somewhere. So it is here on Hive.

One daughter-in-law really hates me. 

## HOW LOVE CAN TURN INTO HATE

I try to stay quiet on FB when it comes to personal things but some information has been passed onto me and I thought it time for me to say something.

There are three sides to every story. The head, the tail side, and the truth somewhere in the middle is the third side.

Let's talk about grief and how every single person on this planet grieves differently. Most people know that, but apparently some do not.

I grieved Karen Lane Anderson . I did not only grieve her since her passing in June 2024 I was grieving since the day she got her cancer diagnosis. Ten and half years.

Karen's whole world had become her four grandchildren and mine also. After her passing there were four birthdays. I went to the first and lasted 5 minutes before my grief over took me. It was a grandparent only function. And walking into a seven year olds birthday and knowing that the grandmother that was dearly loved was not there was heartbreaking. The grandmother that went above and beyond for her.

Then a 7 year old comes and hugs me and asks me with more wisdom that most adults, how are you doing pop, I miss Nanny Ner also. I emotionally lost it.

I tried a second birthday party and managed about 20 minutes.

I missed two birthdays, both out on the east Coast of the island. In my grief I could not see driving 8 hours each way and mentally only being able to stay for 5 minutes or an hour.

I have been accused of some not very nice things over the last few months. But I have very big shoulders.

Today I was supplied with a pile of information about how one person is extremely upset with me. Has been since December.

I am emotionally in a really good place now. I am in a new relationship and getting married again. It is with Cathy C. McLean . Someone I knew before I ever met Karen. But as life does Cathy's and my road in life went separate ways. But fate brought us back together after 25 years and I am so thankful for that.

It is sad that being happy can make others sad and upset.

To be clear for people that know me well, I do blog on another platform. I blog a lot. I let my emotions out in raw form and I am not afraid to say how I feel, felt, or what I have been through. There is an old saying: no one knows what goes on behind closed doors.

Communication between family members is a two way street. Communication while grieving was extremely difficult for me.

I have made some strides over the last few months thanks to Cathy's encouragement and support.

I pushed myself to go to my granddaughters dance practice every Saturday and their recital.

Communication channels all seemed to be fine until I found happiness again.

I hope that as time passes and others have time to deal with their individual grieving that my stepsons, stepdaughter and my grandchildren can all become as close as we were before Karen's passing.

I do miss them all dearly.

Posted using [The BBH Project](https://www.thebbhproject.com/@hive-112281/how-love-can-turn-into-hate)