Generational commendation that runs to our family.

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·@maam.sammy·
0.000 HBD
Generational commendation that runs to our family.
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As I am sitting here in front of my desk, reminiscing about my childhood and early adulthood, one particular moment stands out in my mind: the time when my brother and I were still living at our parent's house, even though we were both working and had graduated from school.

### *I just missed my big brother from abroad.*

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As young adults, my brother and I often talked about our dreams and aspirations outside of our careers. We dreamed of traveling the world and experiencing different cultures, and we often discussed the idea of living on our own and having our own homes. Jokingly, my brother told me that he had no plans to get married anytime soon, to which I wholeheartedly agreed. But, one day, my brother dropped a bombshell: our parents wanted me to get married before him.

I was shocked and confused. ***"Why would my parents think that way?"*** I had always thought that my parents wanted both of their children to be successful and happy, regardless of whether or not they were married. My brother and I had always been very close and I find it really weird for my parents to say such statements in the first place.


My brother then said, ***"It's pretty natural for our parents to aspire for us to have our own families soon. They just want to see us happy and settled. I know it's a bit weird for them to tell you that you should get married before me, but I think they just want to make sure that we're both taken care of."***

I understood his point of view, but I still couldn't shake off the feeling of being judged for not being ready for marriage before him. 

My brother continued, ***"I know how you feel. But you have to remember that we're both different people with different goals and aspirations. Just because I'm not ready for marriage doesn't mean you're not, and vice versa. Our parents just want us to be happy, and I think they just want us to be open to the idea of starting our own families. And besides that, they are not rushing us."***

Then the realization hit me, ***"Yeah, you are right."***

Just as my emotions were starting to subside, my mom entered the room. We hadn't noticed her presence until she spoke up and asked, "What are you two talking about? Marriage?"

My brother and I exchanged a glance before I responded, ***"No, mom. We were just talking about our goals and aspirations. And we're not ready for marriage yet."***

My mom looked at us both with a curious expression, ***"Not ready for marriage yet? But you're both working and you're both adults now. Don't you want to start your own family?"***

My brother chimed in, ***"Of course, we do, mom. But we're not ready right now. We don't even have a boyfriend or girlfriend, to begin with."***

My mom looked a bit surprised, ***"Oh, I see. Well, I just want you both to know that I support you no matter what. I just want you both to be happy and fulfilled."***

I felt relieved that my mom understood where we were coming from and that she supported us. I knew that my brother and I were still figuring things out, but with my mom's support, I felt more confident in our ability to make the right choices for ourselves.

The conversation might have ended, but it was clear that my mom had something more to say. She took out a small velvet box from her pocket and opened it. Inside, there was a beautiful, sparkling wedding ring.

My mom looked at us both with a twinkle in her eye, ***"This is the ring that your grandmother gave me when I got married. And before that, it was given to her by her father, your great-grandfather."*** My brother and I looked at the ring in awe, it was a beautiful ring and it has a lot of sentimental and generational value.

My mom continued ***"I know you both aren't ready for marriage yet, but I want you both to know that this ring will be passed down to one of you when the time is right. It's been passed down through our family for generations and I want to make sure that it continues to be part of our family's history."***

My brother and I were both shocked, ***"But mom!"***, we exclaimed in unison.

My mom smiled gently, ***"I know it's a lot to take in, but just know that this ring is a symbol of love and commitment. And when the time comes, I trust that you both will make the right decision."***

We were still a bit stunned, but we both understood the sentiment behind our mother's offer. We felt honored and touched that she would entrust us with such a valuable and sentimental piece of jewelry. We knew that we weren't ready for marriage yet, but my mom's offer was a reminder that one day, we would be.

We hugged our mom and said ***"Thank you, mom. We promise to take good care of it when the time comes."***
My mom then smiles warmly, ***"Just promise me that you'll come to me whenever you need me. I'll always be here for you both, no matter what."***

Our relationship as siblings grew stronger as time went on. And our mother's offer of the wedding ring and her trust in us to make the right decision, it added a special layer of meaning to the bond that we shared as a family.

My brother and I often found ourselves checking in on each other's romantic status. We would tease each other about when one of us would finally bring home a girlfriend or boyfriend and have that ring mom promised to us.

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Thank you for reading my entry for [Creative Nonfiction in The Ink Well: Prompt #13](https://hive.blog/hive-170798/@theinkwell/creative-nonfiction-in-the-ink-well-prompt-13).

Happily Yours,
Sammy.



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