After A Month Of Rest And Introspection I'm Looking Forward To What's Coming

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ยท@mamritaยท
0.000 HBD
After A Month Of Rest And Introspection I'm Looking Forward To What's Coming
When I woke up this morning I felt stiffness and pain in my neck and upper back. This happens to me very rarely and I'm already feeling better but I realized I had to change my plans for today. Part of the plan was to go through my storage space in the basement. It's not really necessary but I have felt that the energy down there is bugging me for quite some time. I want to get rid of things and just organize things better.

The plan was actually also to post about this in The Hive Minimalistic Community, a community @artemislives invited me to. Well, it's in the pipeline! Not only about my storage space but how I have been living more minimalistic over the years and that having too much stuff around me really stresses me out. But that's another post ๐Ÿ™‚

<center>![IMG_1124.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/mamrita/Eou8i4xRyQ62hrgZGFm8EDqUmQCELmBYhB9ihd35meuLRXvctBgLh7XvPKmdVVR8Tik.JPG)</center><center>*From my living room window today. The strong wind doesn't really show. Fun fact; I actually used to live in one of the buildings on that hill.* ๐Ÿ™‚</center>

Of course it would be great to go out for a walk but there's a storm here and it's also snowing/raining. In a way, I feel it's a great way to end the first month of the new year. I haven't done much in January. As I shared in my last post, I fell ill but when I started feeling better I stayed in a rather introverted space. I had a lot to process. There was also a lot of resistance and emotional pain. I cried a lot. I caught myself in compulsive thought patterns and I was able to penetrate these thoughts with awareness and acceptance. Suddenly there was so much space. And things slowed down also internally.

4 days ago I got my period and I felt it was so timely. As some of your might know I do my best to honor the different phases of my cycle and when I'm on my period I really do my best to rest, rest and rest. It's also an exciting time because a new cycle starts, it's like a new beginning. Sometimes I wonder how it would be to have a male body and not experience these cycles. I have come to love them. I usually draw five cards for each new cycle. One for each phase and then one for the cycle as a whole. I love this routine, it offers me guidance and often reassurance.

I'm starting to feel that I'm shedding skin. That's also why I have felt a bit lost. But new ideas come to me and there's a lot I want to do differently. 

I have been struggling a lot with worrying lately, as I have also shared before. But now something else has emerged inside of me. I feel a strong desire to mess things up. To see what happens if I do so. It's exciting. I guess I'm in a process of letting go.

<center>![IMG_1117.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/mamrita/23y8zBQYWUcqcBVayQZCEZoXoejyWyQvo8Hys3WNpf8GVFDaW5zdrrjEPwEorYESyycMX.jpg)</center><center>*I love deck. I have been using it for years.*</center>

After 2 years of an intensive coach training I have also had a break from clients and practices. Actually since mid-November. And lately I have been thinking a lot about how to find my way back there. I think it's clear that I have been giving too much. So many people have also told me that I'm a very giving person and I guess that's true. Especially with my clients, I have really been giving so much. It wasn't really sustainable. It's been a learning process how to hold space for someone else without feeling depleted myself. But I'm starting to feel a desire again to coach. To build something. Create. But I also feel the first step is to start with myself. I need to find my way back to the practices I guide my clients through. And I know I have to start small and go slow. Which is *very* hard for me. But I want to do things differently from now on.

I have also signed up for quite a lot of things here in Stockholm so from next week I'll be more social again. I also want to be more active physically, this month has been a bit of an exception and that's ok. I guess I needed to just let everything go. I have kind of abandoned pole dancing but instead I have signed up for belly dancing, starting next week ๐Ÿ™‚ I took belly dancing classes in Berlin but I didn't really get that far. I think it will help me to tap into my sexual energy (dancing always does). Actually, I have decided to set an alarm throughout my workdays and take small dancing breaks. It's just the best way to move your energy ๐Ÿ”ฅ

Thanks for reading ๐ŸŒธ

Love and blessings to you all ๐Ÿ’š

<center>![Abundance Tribe banner2.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/mamrita/23zbMXUhQJQhtHNEGutu1bcpjv9VRXP8RiZEYzGN4PgRc7iy7fhUYtF2FYQ3uUGAypCU4.png)</center>

<center>![footer The Herbal Hive.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/mamrita/EoEoeFpekjVerkoKFUBv1ywX6AJbDFErL784NaYY68MGMK84E8ikvh5reJmu43XBWSx.png)</center>
๐Ÿ‘ , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,