Your Brain Damaged Nose
health·@sinushacker·
0.000 HBDYour Brain Damaged Nose
<html> <p>I realize that subject line makes no sense at all but you see, I'm brain damaged. And if you're a 'nose' person there's a good chance you are too; welcome to the club. The sad part is that you didn't earn this honor the traditional way of doing illicit drugs and all the supposed hallucinogenic fun that goes along with it. All you did to cause your own brain damage is breathe; or at least try to breathe. Of course, your sinuses are terrible and you can't breathe worth beans at the best of times and you resent people that can. </p> <p>https://pixabay.com/static/uploads/photo/2014/04/03/11/52/brain-312428_960_720.png</p> <p><a href="https://pixabay.com/static/uploads/photo/2014/04/03/11/52/brain-312428_960_720.png"><em>Pixabay</em></a></p> <h3>Sawing Logs </h3> <p>We spend 1/3rd of our lives in an unconscious state where we have no control over our breathing patterns. It is during this time that people with chronic sinus issues compose masterful symphonies complete with unrelenting pathos and brass chords. Clearly your partner is not a fan of the opera. It doesn't matter, in fact, you enjoy the sound of your own music so much that you unconsciously wake yourself up several times a night to listen to it. </p> <h3>Enter Sleep Apnea </h3> <p>Apnea can be defined as interruption of breathing for 10 seconds or more that results in a reduction of airflow up to 90% below normal. During this time, the brain recognizes a drop in oxygen levels and sends a small wake-up call. You snort, you gasp and the the upper airway opens and your blood oxygen levels return to normal. This can happen hundreds of times a night preventing you from ever reaching deep REM sleep and leaving you feeling drowsy the next day. As an added bonus, each time you wake up, your brain also opens the gate to your bladder necessitating your nightly sleepwalk to the bathroom and back. <br> </p> <p>While clear breathing people (and we hate all of you) are certainly susceptible to this condition, those with chronically stuffy noses are behind the 8-Ball to begin with. </p> <h3>Degrees Of Sleep Apnea </h3> <ol> <li>Obstructive Sleep Apnea <em>(Complete or partial obstruction of the upper airway)</em></li> <li>Central Sleep Apnea <em>(The brain temporarily fails to signal the muscles responsible for breathing)</em></li> <li>Mixed Sleep Apnea <em>(The best of both worlds)</em></li> </ol> <p>I'll let you dig into the specifics of each of those on your own if you are so inclined. </p> <h3>Brain Damage </h3> <p>According to a study published in the Journal of Neuroscience (<a href="http://neurosciencenews.com/sleep-apnea-blood-brain-barrier-2547/">1</a>)<em>, </em>lack of sleep can cause neuron degeneration. Poor sleep also increases your chances of early onset dementia so when you forget where you placed your gloves, try blaming your brain instead of your spouse. Ah what-the-hec, blame them anyway. You'll feel better. </p> <p>A study conducted at the UCLA (<a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2491498/">2)</a><strong> </strong>showed that Obstructive Sleep Apnea has significant consequences to memory, mood and cardiovascular risk. </p> <p>Study Conclusion: 'The study concluded that patients with OSA showed loss of fiber integrity in brain regions associated with behavioral and physiological functions that are deficient in OSA. The deficits appeared in multiple regions, and possibly reflect damage resulting from a number of processes, including hypoxia, oxidative stress, chronic inflammation, small vessel disease, and local ischemia.' </p> <p><br> <em>Well that sounds nice... </em> </p> <p><br> I like to blame my sinuses for all my problems so whenever I do something stupid I immediately shift castigation towards my nose. </p> <h3>What's A 'Nose' To Do? </h3> <p>I try to avoid stepping into the den of the medical Mafia as much as possible but sadly, you won't get much help for this condition anywhere else. You will have to talk to your doctor first who will immediately ask you if you feel drowsy while driving. You see you are a risk to him since you share the same road. If you say yes you'll be sent to a sleep specialist tout de sweet where you will get to spend one or more nights away from the comforts of your own bed trying to fall asleep with a bunch of electrodes hooked up to you. They will send you even if you say no; there's money to be made off you. Inevitably you will be diagnosed with sleep apnea and sold a CPAP machine that forces air into your nose while you sleep. </p> <p><br> The good news is that studies have shown cognitive repair after continued use of a CPAP machine. To me this is the ultimate sleep biohack. Getting smarter while you sleep - what's not to like? Well there's always a catch. The machine is uncomfortable and you look like a freak. Oh and one other minor detail, if you refuse to use it they will take away your driver's license. The machine keeps track of your usage and you are required to provide the data to your friendly neighbourhood sleep specialist on a regular basis. Some machines send the data via an app on your phone for your convenience. </p> <h3>The Surgical Option </h3> <p>There is a surgical procedure that is designed to cut away excess flesh from inside your throat thus opening up your air way. This is usually reserved for patients that cannot tolerate the CPAP machine. I believe our tonsils and uvula (the little punching bag in the back of your throat) exist for a reason so I think I'll keep mine.<br> <br> <em>Disclaimer: The information contained in this article is for discussion purposes only and not intended as a substitute for professional medical advice. Always consult your licensed medical practitioner.</em> </p> <p><br></p> </html>
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