Are You Lonesome?

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·@tarazkp·
0.000 HBD
Are You Lonesome?
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As many might have seen over the last couple years, there is a *loneliness epidemic* sweeping the world. Yet, while people are concerned about the cost of living, war, trade tariffs and what Kanye is up to - no one really seems to care that society is just crumbling apart at the seams - which I think is an indicator of why there is a problem in the first place. And as is the norm of the moment, the generations most afflicted by loneliness - are the young. 

![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tarazkp/243C1uLMF2bGRoWvWhJBgvgGFysT1Mn1vMkajXFJn41vZfGSwCG5WAxFe8WAHK8XHCLa9.png)

> Who could have predicted that raising children on screens to keep them quiet would lead to them having social issues in the future?

As I have said many times prior, a lot of what we do is driven by convenience and this pushes into so many areas that impact our lives. For instance, parents who sit their kids on a screen at a restaurant or in the car to keep them quiet, are *doing their children a disservice.* Children aren't meant to sit still and quiet - they are meant to be curious, asking questions, and learning how to behave in different environments. Sitting a kid on a screen means they behave consistently, conveniently, but in the same way in multiple situations. 

> They are sitting in isolation.

There is a difference between "being alone" and *being lonely.* It is very possible to be surrounded by people, and still feel a sense of loneliness. As I see it, there is a lowering of deep shared experience between people, and this leads to a reduction in intimacy and that sense of connection and belonging. The internet spaces created to make people feel part of a community, are like aspartame - a cancer-causing substitute. And even those places are driven by trends, rather than connection, so people are not committed to those there - they are not in it for the long-haul, and no one really knows each other over time.

> The lost unknowns.

And I think this is a good place to mention another reason that people may be feeling lonely - *because no one knows who they are.* The irony of people demanding to be treated as an individual, in aa world where that same person doesn't care about knowing other people, shouldn't be lost on society. People are isolating themselves as special snowflakes, and are far less accepting of others, and then wondering why they are getting increasingly lonely. 

And while some will say "but I am more accepting of different kinds of people now" realise that for the most part, you are probably only accepting of people and *ideas* that you agree with. And the fact of friendship is, *friends don't always agree.* But in a world of digital point scoring, people will swing from one extreme to another in order to feel their voice is heard and feel a part of some group, based on a single aspect of the dynamic, as if that is all there is to consider. 

The digital space looks at issues as if they exist in a vacuum, but the human experience is influenced by a broad dynamic of influences and interdependencies. If a person doesn't learn how to operate in the dynamic world, they are going to continually find themselves in conflict with others - *and themselves.* People keep finding themselves "feeling the ick" (pathetic) because someone does something, even something slight, that they don't like and can no longer look at the person the same way ever again. 

> People expect perfect from others.

*But expect others to accept their flaws.* 

See the problem with creating lasting friendships?

Rather than working out how to operate in a dynamic environment filled with various kinds of conflict, society has instead taken the convenient path once again, creating safe spaces for everyone - right down to the individual level behind a screen. This means that there is less opportunity (and far less will) to learn how to interact with each other, which means that when people do, there is increased discomfort, and increased error, pushing people to withdraw even further from each other, and back into the safe space of their isolated bubble.

We have created a world that favours transaction for convenience, which has made everything disposable. This includes humans, meaning that we have reduced the value of ourselves, because we want to make it easier to stay in our bubbles of security. We don't want to hear the voices of those we disagree with, other than to score points against them. We don't want to be exposed to random interactions so we close ourselves off behind screens and headsets. We don't want to engage with people who might make us uncomfortable. 

> We put ourselves in a constant state of sensory deprivation.

We are creating a life of withdrawal from the world of interpersonal interaction, as if we are all on the autism spectrum, unable to cope with anything that makes us uncomfortable. And then, we excuse our lack of interpersonal ability by labelling it some kind of social disorder, rather than seeing it for what it largely is - *societal dysfunction.*

We haven't built the technological environment to facilitate social health, and the ramifications of our conditioned behaviours from the way we raise children, to the way we protect ourselves as adults, further exacerbates social dysfunction. We are breaking apart as a species, and breaking apart as individuals, because it is just too inconvenient and too much work, to build ourselves together. 

Loneliness is just another of the many symptoms.

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]


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