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Tomorrow is payday. Normally, it is a bit of a "non-event" because we are organized enough to not have to itch close to salary day, but with the additional costs at the start of the year that bit into our finances, we are still recovering a little. Tomorrow, I get my Q4 bonus paid, so that should cover the last of the shortfall, and get us back on a decent mortgage repayment schedule. Essentially, all disposable income goes onto the house now.

It would be grand if one day there was a lumpsum windfall that meant I could just knock it out altogether. I'd love to be able to surprise my wife one day, zero it and say 

>"See! I told you to be patient".


![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tarazkp/23tGTrqB5Psuh7pjbD4gWArTTHRjDFw9ftTvivsww9UHWrm2LuvqzCW7QP95H5PkHH7HB.png)


> Patience is a virtue.

*Sometimes, I feel I am losing my patience.*

Which just makes me feel like a fool, because I know better. Impatience leads to rash decisions, buying too soon, and selling too soon. But, there is always that sense of *it is better to get something, than nothing,* out of an investment. And, no matter what most say, very few are good at timing the markets. However, I don't have to always time the markets well, I just have to get it right once, right?

> One of these days. 

I was thinking about what I would do with a lumpsum amount, and other than maybe a holiday to Australia for my family, I think it would go into the house. If the mortgage was paid off, the next thing would probably be some landscaping for the garden, so that the water an effectively drain away and we aren't walking through a swamp in spring and autumn. It would be great to be able to build a terrace, put in an extra door (weirdly we only have one door to the outside), and have a neat place to sit and enjoy the summer, as well as grow some edible plants. The other thing would be to put in some heating in the basement so we don't have a repeat of this winter, and neaten up the laundry area so that it isn't just crumbling concrete. 

What is your time worth?

Seven years of daily activity, seven days a week. Late nights, early mornings, thousands, and thousands, and thousands of hours - tens of millions of words. While there is no guarantee that any particular post is going to earn anything at all, over the years, I have put in the effort to make an attempt at generating value.

That value is always dependent on timing, where there are people who have sold far more than I have ever earned, for far less. Some of them, sold far less for much more than what my holdings are valued at. It is one of those things, where some people get the timing right, some people get it very wrong - and that is just the way the trade goes. However, there are some people who get it consistently wrong, often because of impatience or, reliance. If I didn't have a job, would I have been able to hold onto my HIVE? 

From what I have seen, when people are in that situation, it just tends to get whittled away here and there, as the needs arise. And, there are *always needs* that arise, aren't there? Always unexpected costs, broken machines, frozen pipes, health scares, accidents, bills... If there is no other way to cover an expense, what choice is there but to sell holdings? 

Yet, I do think that people often make it hard on themselves, because they don't want to have a job of any kind, let alone a crappy one. A lot of people seem to live in this romantic fantasy world where they think that scraping by, grinding at anything as long as it isn't employment, is somehow winning. 

>I don't think it is.

It might not be a sexy opinion, but being an employee increases options to invest, especially in crypto. It allows life to be covered, so the "grind" can happen and actually have investment value, not just spending value. If I didn't have a job, I don't think it would be possible for me to spend so much time writing on Hive, because I would have to be finding other ways to make ends meet, and that is *taxing.* 

> That means "tiring". 

I have known of a few people through my life who are constantly looking to get all they can in the form of government handouts, spending hundreds of hours trying to squeeze a bit more out, and when they do, they feel like they are winning, because they are "beating the system". 

>No - they are not beating the system, they are supporting the system.

The surest way to ensure that one is forever a slave to the system, is become reliant on handouts from the government. Being reliant on handouts means, being unable to own anything of generative value, and resigns a person to a life of hand to mouth living, and unfulfilled wants, with no way to fill them. It is a life of suffering in my opinion, and is far more trouble than it is worth, with no end in sight. 

But, some people think that it is a better life than to swap some work for some money, in order to have a bit extra to invest. Yet, often the same people complain about those who have invested and are earning passively, so which is it? 

> Handouts scare me.

Not because they are a control mechanism used to keep people from ownership, but because I hate being reliant on people. Getting old scares me for this reason too, as does the chance of having another stroke and ending up a vegetable. Death isn't scary - losing capacity and being a burden on others, is terrifying.

But, maybe that is what I will end up being, just another burden. However, what I am hoping is that I can do enough now to offset that end and pay my way, so that at least whoever has to look after me, will get some benefits out of it to reduce their suffering. It would suck to be a burden on others, *and have nothing to reward them for their efforts.*

When the timing is right...

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]


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