http://i.imgur.com/s0ungvd.jpg

Here I am on my lunch break between sessions. I just came from a client who is struggling at work but remains unstressed. The reason for the challenges are only partly his but he is the one that must take the brunt of the weight.

He is unstressed because of his process. He has identified over the last year the gaps in his knowledge and skillset and created plans for each. Even though his day to day work takes precedence, he consistently and frequently visits his plan, adjusts where necessary and tracks his inroads in his growth.

For him, this has meant that he has discovered a lot about himself that was previously hidden. X's in his formulations. He hadn't considered how much of a role he plays in his experience at a practical level and has now realised that he has much more agency than he previously thought.

For a lot of us, we often feel that we are at the mercy of our environment, not active participants in it. Things happen to us is the view and although it can be emotionally soothing to shift blame, the cost of losing agency is a high one.

Stress itself is less about the situation and more about how we feel we will cope or are coping in the situation. For some, slight changes in workload throw the psyche into disarray, whereas others can have mountains placed on their backs and barely bend at the knees.

Perhaps the mechanisms for coping are of varying degrees naturally occurring in people but improvement is always possible. No child was born walking, let alone running and jumping. It is the development of years of trial and error, practice and bumps and bruises. Mental strength requires the same.

Leaving its growth up to others may be an easy path, but the cost of its inability is paid by the individual within their experience. We all know people that cope poorly under even the slightest stress, panic and act from a position of desperation. It may even be common, but high frequency does not mean correct.

Hopefully, we all also have those around us that demonstrate strength under pressure so that we can role model them. If not, I guess we have to be that person for ourselves and take a step back, find our strengths, identify our weaknesses and be active in our experience. 

Taraz
[ a Steemit original ]

The image is from Amsterdam in the flower market. Looking up can bring its own rewards, as can looking down.