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In the 24 weeks that I have been going to the gym, I have made it 62 times, for an average of 2.58 times per week. However, in week 51 of 2023, I didn't make it there once, ending a 20 week streak. Then, it was only twice in the last week  of the year, and today was the *first time* this year, and we are already *two weeks in.*  Shameful. Though, granted, the main reason for not going this year, has been the issues with the house. Still, I value consistency, and I have been far from consistent.

![image.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/tarazkp/23u5zx64jUhUT9xH2haLEC9bpoHhhUAmPDX6brfMHdEPYmvjoJy97QEQ7xbPk8F9SAd6A.jpg)

It wasn't an overly great workout today though, and I felt awkward and out of sorts. It could be that I haven't been in a few weeks, or it could be that I have a lot on my mind and am finding it hard to focus, but it was still better than *not going.* There really is no such thing as a perfect time, so it is better just to do what is possible, when it is possible. 

>The only time that we can't improve, is the time already gone.

With my friend yesterday, we were discussing why it is so hard to do what we know we should do to improve. It really is hard to live up to our potential, because there are so many things that get in our way, but most of the time, the biggest hurdle, is ourselves, and our mindset. Or perhaps it is our lack of attention, or maybe, the lack of *intention.*

If every moment of our attention was able to move with intention, where there was no blind default, it would mean that in each moment, we would knowingly make a decision, which means if we choose the thing that will not help us, we are intentionally doing it. It is in our awareness and likely, that would mean that more often than not, we would make better choices.

Most of the time however, we only acknowledge making the poor decision in reflection, once the decision has already been made. This is natural of course, because when we act, we always think we are doing the right thing, until it is proven otherwise. My visualization for this is the coyote chasing the roadrunner in a cloud of smoke, and runs off the edge of a cliff. It isn't until the smoke clears and he looks down, that he realizes his mistake, and falls. But, the mistake was made before his realization he had made it.

In order to make better decisions, or the decisions we want to make, we have to find ways to remind ourselves to make the choice *before* we make the choice. This means, we can't make those choices on default, or, we have to train our defaults to make the choices we want to make. This is easier said than done, because we have all kinds of conditioning factors that make us feel that what we are doing is right, even though it isn't leading to the results we want. 

>I wish my watch would shock me every time I reached for some kind of junk food.

It wouldn't necessarily stop me but it would be that clear flag that says, *pay attention, act with intention.* It would be useful to have it for every stupid thing I say, before I say it. Having that jolt reminder, would likely be enough to trigger me into making better decisions. 

And, I wonder how much variance there is in willpower, because a lot of the things that we "should do" require willpower to consistently do them. I assume that like every other human trait, willpower is variable across individuals, and changes depending on other conditions too, like diet, or energy levels. While we can train our will, we are probably all born with varying degrees of baseline, making it harder for some, than others. And of course, the way we are raised and our experiences impact on this behavior too. 

There is an app to do just about everything these days, yet for the decisions we make in the moment, until it is embedded into our brains, we are likely going to have to find other ways to affect our default behavior. 

*Sounds like a lot of work.*

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]



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