After years of a compulsive addiction to consume as much culture as possible, an attempt to know every "relevant" thing that appeared in the mainstream and the especially the underground, one day I decided to prioritize my inner peace and my ability to live in the NOW.  It happened when my computer broke and I only had an old Nokia, I think it was around the time Iphone 4 had come out, I still hadn't touched a smart phone.  My concerns about privacy and the subconscious acknowledgement that I was, in fact, addicted and wasting a ton of time on the internet prevented me from seeking out a smartphone, and I barely had any money at that time, so it would have been hard to buy one anyway.

![night-television-tv-theme-machines.jpg](https://ipfs.busy.org/ipfs/QmXXc93bRFYf43woYa6W3tHDjZVmcYk4obvHGfLcNbWYtJ)
[television people](https://www.pexels.com/photo/night-television-tv-video-8158/)



So for about a year and a half, I spent half of my time staring into space and enjoying whatever was surrounding me.  I was busking and volunteering full time and had plenty of things to do, a vibrant community around me to play with and little money to pay for distractions.  I finally managed to put an end to my media consumption addition.  I didn't even realize it happened.

There were side effects of living without television though.  I had no idea who Lady Gaga was and she had already been famous for 4 years.  That in itself was fine, but imagine all the all other things I had never heard about.  I was listening exclusively to James Blake and Fela Kuti and had very little shared culture with ANYONE I met unless they listened to those too and happened to read "Conversations with God" or "Spiritual Enlightenment, the Damndest thing" which I was reading at the time.  

Many of my friends were stoned artists who were living in squats and the like so it wasn't that bad when I was in a familiar group of friends, but I can't tell you how hard it was to interact with academics and the corporate crowd, or basically anyone who had their own apartment.  I felt like we spoke different languages, even in predominantly English speaking crowds....ESPECIALLY in English speaking crowds and English is my mother tongue.  The vocabulary was changing faster than I was being exposed to the changes.  Pot had become legalized and Gay was OK in the States, and I wasn't there when it happened, nor did I really pay much attention to the culture that had followed these changes.  

Unlike many of my friends, I made an effort to interact with all the "normal people" but it was a struggle.  It was already hard enough to answer questions like "What do you do?" but even "What are you into?" became a struggle to answer.  "I like to jam with musicians who aren't really that good at any particular instrument"    Their response was usually a long drawn out "OOOOOOOKKKKKK" or a change in the conversation back to "Me".

As I write this I realized that being an "ex-pat" compounds the degree of complication I felt when trying to relate to almost anyone, even in the "indie scene" and so I feel it's hard to really paint a picture in a short article or two.  But I suppose someone who is essentially introverted and hangs out by themselves in nature most of the time can imagine very well how I felt.

I thought Iphone 5 was coming out when iphone 8 came out.  By that time I had a pad to make up for the lack of a smartphone.  I try not to look down on people who tweet responses to whatever Kanye West or Donald Trump are saying this week, but it's become hard to relate to those who are part of a strong culture and don't realize the influence that culture exerts on them, be it mainstream or underground.  Those who judge the gossipers are just as difficult for me to relate to as the gossipers themselves.

Some friends are difficult to stay in touch with because we literally have nothing to talk about other than past shared experiences.  I know that is a common problem but it's expounded when you've practically been living in separate planets for over 10 years.

Now even though I'm back on social media, it's all steemit and discord....hah, I asked some old friends if they had discord accounts expecting them to know what it was. They did not.  I did not ask if they have telegram, but I'm curious to know if they know what that is.  Do they have snapchat?  I don't even really know what snapchat is.  Instagram?  I've never used used it.  Do they even still check facebook? I have no idea what people are doing these days.  What is normal for 13 year olds and what is normal for 35 year olds, it all kind of blends together for me.

The funny thing is, I can actually relate with others easily, it's more that others have a hard time relating to me.  I can enjoy scenery together with anyone, tease and joke without words, create art and enjoy music with anyone and everyone.  It's not hard for me to meet someone half way, but I do find I leave many people with a big question mark over their head.  In those moments, I guess I could bring up Westworld or Game of Thrones since those are the two mainstream shows I bothered to watch.  If I sense the person really wants to ramble about the stuff they know, I might bring those up in order to avoid any other TV talk, or sports talk or celebrity gossip or polarized political debates.  We could talk about older music or other nostalgia, but those conversations don't do much for me unless I've already developed a bond with someone.  So I guess in all other situations I'm ok with weirding people out.

I hope one day we can relate on what we are experiencing in the NOW rather than trying to look every which way to find something else to focus on and relate on those things.  Maybe one day a beautiful sunset and a playful attitude will be enough for everyone to make friends.  

This article wasn't as articulate as I had hoped, maybe one day I'll write more on this topic and go deeper on it.