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Last Weekend, one of my church friends suddenly messaged me and invited me to jog again. Pre-pandemic, we jogged together a few times at UP Diliman, and that was actually one of the things I missed. Of course, I said yes right away! 

On Monday, we agreed to meet at around 5PM in one of the fastfoods near UP. We were even joined by another friend from church, who I also missed so much! Wohoo!

It was already almost 6PM when we walked to UP, and I was taken aback with how different it already felt and looked at that time of the day. There were only a few people jogging, and the streets were dark. All the stores were closed, and majority of the lamp posts were not working. It certainly wasn't the view I was expecting. Still, we pushed through with our plan. 

In the duration of the pandemic, I think I only got to jog twice or thrice. Most of the time, I am either sitting or lying down, so I wasn't expecting much from myself during this jogging session. However, my performance was worse than I perceived. 

I ran out of breath super duper fast, and my sides started to hurt. I slowed down and stayed within my pace. I took deep breaths and just walked slowly, not minding the fact that my two jog-mates were already quite far from me. 

I really didn't mind being left behind, and instead wanted them to just continue. But when they noticed our distance, they stopped! They waited for me! Although that made me shy, as I didn't want to disrupt their pace, the happiness I felt overpowered it. I was deeply touched. 

After two rounds of jogging around, we all agreed to leave, as it also seemed like rain was about to fall. We went back to the fastfood from earlier, where we surprisngly stayed at for more or less 3 hours! It didn't feel that long, honestly. Haha

We just talked about random things about church service, people we know, school/work life, etc. Oh! I discovered that one of them listens to PPop songs, too, while the other one has zero idea about it. HAHAHA I had a blast, really. 

Going home, I was the only one who needed to cross the footbridge at PhilCoa, as they both were headed to the same direction. I told them that I could already go by myself because it would be such a hassle for them to go back and forth. But they insisted on walking me until I got to ride, saying that it was unsafe for me to walk alone and that they were fine.

It may seem like it was such a small thing, but for me, it was huge! Their concern was so pure and sincere. I was already crying inside. Haha. I am not really used to having people look after me, so that seemingly simple gesture was already a big deal for me.

At that moment when I was listening to their conversation while we were walking on that isolated footbridge, the first thought that came to mind was, *"I have such amazing friends. This. This is how I should be treated."* 

In that short span of time, I got to reflect. It seemed like a voice whispered in my ears and told me that I usually don't feel comfortable being served or taken care of, not only because I am not used to it, but also because I often feel like I don't deserve to be in the receiving end. As a famous line from a book says, "*We accept the love we think we deserve.*"

That line. It makes more sense to me now.

Stay sane and safe!
Let's spread happiness. 
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<center><b>herkeepsake</b></center></h4> 
<center> <i>This is M's online journal. Join her as she reminisce memories, discover new things, or simply vomit words on pages. Sometimes she is an artist; other times she is the art.
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