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When I was looking to rent a house, the first thing I considered was the beauty or overall comfort that the house would offer, and for a reasonable amount of money too. In the first house, I didn't really get the aesthetics of the place, but it was closer to the market and the electricity was good, it wasn't too far from where my relatives lived, but the owners wouldn't give me the place. They wanted a *9 to 5er* and someone married too, but I was happy I never got the place.


 Long story short I missed out all the places I felt I wanted and later settled for the one I never thought I would. However, I took the house after some short and long-term consideration, and fast-forward to today the long-term benefits are beginning to pay off. In the beginning, it felt like a very bad decision, but when I settled I discovered it was an overall good decision. 


The benefits were that the owner of the house was a responsible person, in fact, I could have sunk into severe depression if I had taken other options and that was because, during the early weeks, I lost my brother. My place was exactly accessible, and the owner of the house was instrumental in helping me, especially when I couldn't cook my meals and the only thing I did was to stay awake all night languishing in tears and pain.



 I haven't even begun to talk about how the place has helped with accessibility to my numerous hospital sessions and visits, while it isn't exactly the house I'd take, I think that sometimes, we look at short-term aesthetics over long-term usability and benefit. I'm not saying my life turned out better than it currently is, all I'm saying is that it could have been worse, and while this isn't exactly a life-changing decision, I think it was one of the decisions that prevented me from completely capitulating. 


At the moment, I'm trying to pick my life back up and sometimes I look at my current decision making and it wasn't what it used to be some months ago. A lot of people are actively paying more attention to some aspects of their lives, and this is because they feel relaxed in some aspects. For example, a person who is owing a loan might not be able to save for personal reasons. This is because paying back the debt they owe significantly stops them from moving to some other financial aspect of their lives. 


At the moment, in not as articulate as I used to be. I spend these days without thinking much. I don't think about the futuristic repercussions or trying to gain more value for spending, and this is largely attributed to the fact that there's an important aspect of my life that is flawed, and this has probably dampened my outlook on life. I might not be in the right state of mind, but I'm thankful that some of the decisions I made when I was thinking differently haven't worsened the present situation in my life. 


Of course, I cannot go back to thinking the way I used to, this is because I don't care for the things that used to excite me anymore. It's not about having enough, it's about not having the mentality that the frivolities, the money, the doggedness, and the rat race of life are worth it anymore. To a regular hustler whose aim is to make all the money in the world, I might currently be talking rubbish. 


However, it's saddening that I have to reach this mental state this quickly, for a while, I thought I could push this further. Make no mistake, money is underrated, especially when we try to weigh the things it can do, however, there's a mental state we reach, and even the satisfaction that comes with it loses its sting, the spark and the excitement. 


Of course, I've been trying to push. In the past with my family here, it was like pushing a boulder downhill, nowadays it's just like pushing a boulder uphill. It's harder, difficult, and mentally exhausting. I know what I have battling all my life, but over the years I've managed to cope because I had the necessary people. However, life eventually happens to everyone. The timing is only different, but then, I look back and it's been such a journey. 








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> **Interested in some more of my works**



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##### [Is it Easy To Make Money?](https://peakd.com/hive-167922/@josediccus/is-it-easy-to-make-money-)


##### [Nigeria: A Unique Business Market & Industry](https://peakd.com/hive-167922/@josediccus/nigeria-a-unique-business-market-and-industry)


##### [Virtual Bank Apps In Nigeria: An Experience Of Gamification](https://peakd.com/hive-167922/@josediccus/tfgktsjk)



##### [How To Find The Next "BIG" Meme Coin](https://peakd.com/hive-167922/@josediccus/how-to-find-the-next-big-meme-coin)


##### [Personal Finance: Achieving Intentional "Saving" Goals](https://peakd.com/hive-167922/@josediccus/snyczgol)



##### [Playing The Survival Game: Human Nature In Introspection](https://peakd.com/hive-167922/@josediccus/playing-the-survival-game-human-nature-in-introspection-rufcp3)



##### ["Un-PAYING" The Debt You Owe](https://hive.blog/hive-167922/@josediccus/-unpaying-the-debt-you-owe)



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